Growing Pains...

Whew!  Wow things have changed since last Friday.  I truly hope this finds you well.  To say that the world is not in a graceful time would be putting it mildly.  No matter what your political beliefs and how you felt about the election or what your beliefs are about COVID and the spikes in cases, I do not think it’s controversial to say that things are pretty rough out there. Whether it’s effecting you personally or not, we are all a part of this collective angst and it’s hard to not be impacted by it.  

As I was walking the dog today a metaphor came up that made me feel a lot better.  Thought I’d share.  To be honest, this really relieved some of my own angst which has been intense lately, I’m not going to lie! 

When I was a little girl I remember my legs hurting so much I would cry.  I didn’t understand what was wrong.  It was intense pain that I still remember to this day.  It scared me and made me feel like something was terribly wrong with me. Similarly, when my youngest son was in 7th grade, he went through intense leg and hip pain for months...almost a year!  He was in so much pain, in fact, he couldn’t even skateboard, which is what he loves the most.  It was scary and I at times found myself catastrophizing. In both cases, (I’m sure you’re not surprised) the official diagnosis from medical world was, you guessed it: Growing Pains.  

Now we all know that growing pains are nothing to worry about and that everyone goes through them in some way or another.  They are no big deal in the scheme of things.  But when they are happening, they feel pretty dang serious!  They can be scary and they can even make us cry and change our life.  Going through them can be terrible. 

But at the end of the day, they are not harmful to us. In fact, they are leading us to something better.  The son I was talking about (I have two) is now 6’2” for example even though he’s only a freshman! And I have become an adult (not sure that’s a good thing, but it would be super weird if I was still 7!)

None of us would have wanted to stay in 7th grade just to avoid our growing pains, right? It hurts to grow. It hurts to go through the transformation process, no matter what it is.  Whether that’s growing from a kid to an adult or the process of getting pregnant and bringing a new life into the world, IT HURTS...and it hurts like hell even!  It doesn’t necessarily mean there is something wrong or that anything bad is happening.

See my point?  No matter how bad it seems right now, all this crazy crap is just growing pains. Our world and especially our country is going through a massive, painful growing process. It hurts, sometimes like Hell, but everything is exactly as it needs to be.  We are just going through a HUGE shift on our planet.  Some are even calling it “The Great Awakening.”  What we are awakening to or shifting toward, however, none of us really know.  We just know that the old is falling away, and that is painful. The new hasn’t yet become clear, and that is also very painful.  

It’s kinda like the ninth month of pregnancy.  (If you haven’t had the experience, I’m sure you know someone who has or at least can imagine how it must be) It’s pretty terrible. You feel like you want to crawl out of your skin.  Anxious all the time and feel like something could happen at any moment.  Plus you’re so heavy you just feel sluggish and terrible all the time.  At least that’s how I felt.  I couldn’t wait to get my babies out, but I was also terrified about how I was going to take care of them once they were!  That is exactly what’s happening to us globally. But unlike pregnancy, we don’t know how long this gestation period is going to be. We don’t even really know if we’re in the 9th month or the first month of the process!  It’s very unclear. 

The biggest realization I have had recently is that this growth and awakening is not only happening on the world stage.  The world is just a mirror of what is happening inside every single one of us.  “As above, so below.  As within, so without”. It’s all connected.  And we are ALL going through our own awakening at this time.  It looks very different for each of us.  That’s why we are all having such dramatically different reactions to the similar challenges.  Each persons experience is specifically designed to wake that person up. But most of us are feeling this pain in some way or another. Some worse than others.  Some better. But we are all impacted. No one is spared.  

Just like in childbirth. Some women experience morning sickness that wreaks havoc on their lives.  Others float through pregancy feeling better than ever, but NO ONE experiences NO pain or suffering or at least intensity in the birthing process.  No one I’ve ever heard of anyway!

In this case, you don’t even need to know what you are birthing or what is waking up in you.  It’s happening regardless of whether you are doing it consciously or not. Kinda like when we grow physically or give birth.  It’s going to happen whether we think about it or not!  

In this process of awakening all our unhealed trauma (from our own lives and our ancestors) is getting kicked up and causing us to feel ALL the feels.  One minute we can feel grateful and joyful while the next minute we feel like the world is crashing down around us.  It’s like we’re on a frickin roller coaster ride.  NO matter what you do you can’t avoid it.  I talked last week about learning to surf the waves of uncertainty, but really, ultimately, we need to heal.  

Believe it or not, every time we get upset about something, it is actually giving us an opportunity to heal at a deeper level.  This anger, this anxiety, this hopelessness, this depression are all opportunities to heal and release past trauma.  It’s an opportunity to go deeper in our healing journey. If we accept that invitation or not, is entirely up to you.  

Now what does this actually mean to “heal at a deeper level?”  A lot of people talk about healing and releasing trauma, but not many people actually talk about what that really means.  That is a blog that I am working on for next week...Ooooooh CLIFFHANGER!! Be sure to stay tuned and read next week’s blog to find out! LOL

And as for your practical tips for the week, here are a few affirmations to say to yourself when you’re feeling stressed, anxious or upset. And yes, I felt calmer after I read them too!  

1. All of this chaos is just the world’s growing pains.  Everything is as it should be.

2. I am exactly where I need to be in my life right now.

3. In this moment I choose peace and no one can take that from me.

4. In this moment I am safe, all is well.

5. I embrace this change and uncertainty, for it will allow me to grow. (That’s a tough one!  Advanced practice!)

6. I am supported by forces greater than myself. I am blessed.

7. Peace is my priority.  If I need to turn off this program, video, post, podcast, conversation, etc. to maintain my peace, so be it!

8. These are old feelings releasing.

9. This intensity is evidence that I am upgrading and preparing for a better life.

10. I am love. I am loved.

Hope this helps you to connect with peace for even one minute more than you would have otherwise.  Even that little bit has an impact. If you can grow that to 5 min or 20 or that you can have 5-10 min of peace every day, then imagine the impact of that on your health, on your fam, on the world...  If you need more support or you just want someone to talk to, give me a ring! I have a few spots available in my practice and would love help more people heal (which I will elaborate more on next week).

BIG LOVE!

Nancy